[Everyone] IMPORTANT Fwd: Re: Internet Week

Paul
Mon Nov 8 12:04:44 GMT 2010


Giles,

Your email actually came to me. I opened it as it had the word IMPORTANT in
the subject bit. To solve the issue of the word IMPORTANT in emails I've
just registered it as a trademark belonging to me (capitals only, lower case
is fine). Please do not use the word IMPORTANT (capitals only, lower case is
fine) in your emails. 

Legal,
Can you sort some of your No Claim NO Gain forms in anticipation of staff
abusing the word IMPORTANT. 

IT,
Can you let me know where the Trademark symbol is on my keyboard.

HR,
Please note this email has taken me 10 minutes to write so I will be leaving
early today to make up for it.

Maintenance,
Please ask Philip to stop shouting on 3rd. I'm going for a break and will
sort his finger on return. In the meantime please wrap in a bag of frozen
lamb chops from the canteen.

Canteen,
Please cancel lamb chops for this lunch and go for nut roast.

All staff,
Please be aware that lunch is not suitable today for nut allergy sufferers
as it contains nuts. There is no alternative.

Regards
Paul RISK IMPORTANT 


-----Original Message-----
From: 
 On Behalf Of Giles
Turnbull
Sent: 08 November 2010 11:34
To: Everyone in the office
Subject: [Everyone] IMPORTANT Fwd: Re: Internet Week

Eve,

Please can you ask Paul not to use the IMPORTANT word in email
subjects, because that's reserved for CorpExec use only, and improper
use may result in messages being un-filed or mis-answered. I'm sending
this directly to you, rather than to the Everyone address, to make
sure that nothing weird happens as Paul warned in his previous message
previously.

Kind regards

Giles
Client-Vision Liaison Officer (Solutions)


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Paul 
Date: 8 November 2010 11:15
Subject: [Everyone]  Re: Internet Week
To: Everyone in the office 


***This is an automated reply from RISK***

Thank you for your very interesting email. Unfortunately RISK is unable to
cope with the large number of messages being received at present so we have
set out computer to delete everything until things calm down a bit. If your
email is really important, please put IMPORTANT in the subject bit at the
top.

***Please do not reply to this reply as something weird might happen. You
know, going back a forth and stuff. A bit like coming across yourself in the
future and blowing up***

Paul RISK

-----Original Message-----
From: 
 On Behalf Of Giles
Turnbull
Sent: 08 November 2010 10:54
To: Everyone in the office
Subject: [Everyone] Re: Internet Week

Further to Phil's useful information about Internet Week, please note
that this week, during Internet Week, the Client-Vision team will be
unveiling the new Pretend Office Facebook Website. From the Facebook,
you will be able to post your own team "blogs" and invite other
members of Pretend to attend Virtual Meetings, which we believe will
be a first for any company in our sector in this particular postcode.

If you are invited to a Virtual Meeting on the Pretend Facebook,
please note attendance is compulsory at the specified meeting time.

As an added bonus, the Pretend Facebook will be available throughout
Internet Week, since it will not be affected by loss of access to the
internet because it is on Facebook.

Kind regards

Giles
Client-Vision Liaison Officer (Solutions)



On 8 November 2010 10:42, Phil  wrote:
> Hi all,
>
> As I'm sure you're all well aware, this week is Internet Week and as a
foreward-thining company we will be doing everything we can do to promote
this modern marvel!
>
> As part of this initiative, the boffins in IT are planning to do some
rolling out of network upgrading, which will mean the Internet will be
unavailable for every department at some point this week. Please consult the
schedule on the internal Intranet to see when the Internet will be unaviable
to you.
>
> Thankyou.
>
>
> --
> Phil BA(Hons)
> VVP of Visioning Management and Corporate Resourcing
> http//:www.pretendoffice.co.uk
> tel: +44 (0)20 7946 0372
> mob(ile): +44 (0)7700 900837
>
> "If you really want something you can figure out how to make it happen."
Cher
>
> _______________________________________________
> Everyone mailing list
> 
> http://www.pretendoffice.co.uk/
>
> --
> This email and any attachments to it may be confidential and are intended
solely for the use of the individual to whom it is addressed. Any views or
opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily
represent those of Pretend Office.
> If you are not the intended recipient of this email, you must neither take
any action based upon its contents, nor copy or show it to anyone.
> Please contact the sender if you believe you have received this email in
error.
>
_______________________________________________
Everyone mailing list

http://www.pretendoffice.co.uk/

--
This email and any attachments to it may be confidential and are intended
solely for the use of the individual to whom it is addressed. Any views or
opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily
represent those of Pretend Office.
If you are not the intended recipient of this email, you must neither take
any action based upon its contents, nor copy or show it to anyone.
Please contact the sender if you believe you have received this email in
error.

_______________________________________________
Everyone mailing list

http://www.pretendoffice.co.uk/

--
This email and any attachments to it may be confidential and are
intended solely for the use of the individual to whom it is addressed.
Any views or opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do
not necessarily represent those of Pretend Office.
If you are not the intended recipient of this email, you must neither
take any action based upon its contents, nor copy or show it to
anyone.
Please contact the sender if you believe you have received this email in
error.
_______________________________________________
Everyone mailing list

http://www.pretendoffice.co.uk/

--
This email and any attachments to it may be confidential and are intended
solely for the use of the individual to whom it is addressed. Any views or
opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily
represent those of Pretend Office.
If you are not the intended recipient of this email, you must neither take
any action based upon its contents, nor copy or show it to anyone.
Please contact the sender if you believe you have received this email in
error.



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