[Everyone] EMAIL AMNEST-E ANNOUNCEMENT

Giles
Tue Dec 8 21:32:47 GMT 2009


EMAIL AMNESTY -- URGENT

For one day only!

More than 67 million email messages are currently stored in the company's
Lotus Notes mailboxes and archive mailboxes. This overload of email
threatens to leak out of the server room and create another flood - this one
electronic! An electronicked email flood through the ENTIRE BUILDING! Do you
want to be held responsible for THAT? Of course not.

If each of the archived messages were printed out on Pretend headed
notepaper using a Microsoft Word in Arial 12, and stacked on top of each
other, the pile would stand 3.3 km high. That's more than twice the height
of Ben Nevis, the highest mountain in the entire world!  Your help is needed
to reduce this mountain by deleting emails from both your mailbox and
archive mailbox.

Please follow the following steps immediately:

1. Delete 'Sent' mails that are more than 1 year old
2. Delete all mails that are over 3 years old (to do this open the view
'Views - All Documents' and sort by date)
3. Delete any messages regarding past timesheets (only timesheet-related
emails from THIS WEEK are relevant)
4. Delete any messages from SIDWISE as these are considered low prioritised

For more tips on how to tidy your personal mountain of emails please contact
Tom in IT who will be delighted to spend time with you on a ONE-TWO-ONE
basis to discuss your needs and show you which emails you should delete.

Please remember that copying mails to cd, dvd, USB stick, or any portable
media is strictly prohibited, as is deleting this particular email.

If you have any queries, email UK Email Amnesty Team on
ukamnest-e at pretendoffice.co.uk. Ensure you use the words "EMAIL AMNESTY
QUERY - PLEASE DO NOT DELETE" in the subject line, otherwise your email may
be deleted.

Kind regards

Giles
Executive Account Executive (Level 4)
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