[Everyone] Re: Chair servicing

Paul
Wed Dec 15 16:26:55 GMT 2010


Dearest Cat,

You may well have assisted Phil with good intention, but the guarantee for
his drawing is now no longer valid. 

Paul RISK 

Employer of the Month (Pending)

 

 

 

From: 
 On Behalf Of Cat
Sent: 15 December 2010 16:01
To: Everyone in the office
Subject: [Everyone] Re: Chair servicing

 

Phil,

I'm still looking into this but from a legal standing point vis a vis any
sort of security action you may be planning to undertake vis a vis the
return of your chair I have to advise that you are operating within a
surrealist environment  which we are given to understand within the letters
of lawyers is an aesthetic philosophy that aims for the liberation of the
mind by emphasizing the critical and imaginative powers of the subconscious
and therefore, working within such a jurisdiction, the usual definitions of
what is and what is not are not legally actionable vis a vis the surrealists
chairs which might be chairs but which might just as well be drawings or
even bananas.

 

Happy Christmas.

 

Cat

Legal Eagles flying high on 66

 

  _____  

From: Phil 
To: Everyone in the office 
Sent: Wednesday, December 15, 2010 11:46:37
Subject: [Everyone] Re: Chair servicing

Hi all,

I have just got in to the office after a very important client brunchette
with some clients and my chair is missing. It is important that I have my
own chair which has been calibrated for me alone. I would appreciate it if
my chair could be returned henceforth.

Even worse, whoever took my chair appears to have only left me with just a
drawing of it, as if this is all some kind of joke. But this is VERY SERIOUS
and if, the chair is not returned forthwith I will be giving the drawing to
security to follow up. The drawing is not a chair!

Thankyou.


On 15 Dec, 2010, at 11:23, Paul wrote:

> It's been an absolute pleasure receiving all your questions about
Surrealist
> Chair servicing. It's nice to know you respect my knowledge about such
> matters, especially during what is known as a festive period. This area of
> assistance will be wrapped up at 5pm today so if you haven't yet requested
> assistance please make sure you do so before this time.
> 
> Please remember I am not able to give advice on matters regarding
servicing
> the Surrealist Chair as it invalidates the guarantee. 
> 
> If there is anything else I can assist with please don't hesitate to get
in
> touch.
> 
> Paul RISK
> (Risk is KEY - Risk is ME)
> 
> 
> -----Original Message-----
> From: 
>  On Behalf Of Phil
Gyford
> Sent: 14 December 2010 10:53
> To: Everyone in the office
> Subject: [Everyone] Re: Chair servicing
> 
> Hi all,
> 
> I have found a fish in my Surrealist chair, can you do something about
it!?
> 
> (I haven't really, but a fish is a surreal object, so this is a joke.)
> 
> Thankyou.
> 
> 
> On 13 Dec, 2010, at 11:20, Paul wrote:
> 
> for
before
>> the end of year or their guarantee wont be valid.
> solely for the use of the individual to whom it is addressed. Any views or
> opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily
> represent those of Pretend Office.
take
> any action based upon its contents, nor copy or show it to anyone.
> error.
> 
> 
> 
> -- 
> Phil BA(Hons)
> VVP of Visioning Management and Corporate Resourcing
> http//:www.pretendoffice.co.uk
> tel: +44 (0)20 7946 0372
> mob(ile): +44 (0)7700 900837
> 
> "If you really want something you can figure out how to make it happen."
> Cher
> 
> _______________________________________________
> Everyone mailing list
> 
> http://www.pretendoffice.co.uk/
> 
> --
> This email and any attachments to it may be confidential and are intended
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> opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily
> represent those of Pretend Office.
> If you are not the intended recipient of this email, you must neither take
> any action based upon its contents, nor copy or show it to anyone.
> Please contact the sender if you believe you have received this email in
> error.
> 
> _______________________________________________
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> 
> http://www.pretendoffice.co.uk/
> 
> --
> This email and any attachments to it may be confidential and are intended
solely for the use of the individual to whom it is addressed. Any views or
opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily
represent those of Pretend Office.
> If you are not the intended recipient of this email, you must neither take
any action based upon its contents, nor copy or show it to anyone.
> Please contact the sender if you believe you have received this email in
error.



-- 
Phil BA(Hons)
VVP of Visioning Management and Corporate Resourcing
http//:www.pretendoffice.co.uk
tel: +44 (0)20 7946 0372
mob(ile): +44 (0)7700 900837

"If you really want something you can figure out how to make it happen."
Cher

_______________________________________________
Everyone mailing list

http://www.pretendoffice.co.uk/

--
This email and any attachments to it may be confidential and are intended
solely for the use of the individual to whom it is addressed. Any views or
opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily
represent those of Pretend Office.
If you are not the intended recipient of this email, you must neither take
any action based upon its contents, nor copy or show it to anyone.
Please contact the sender if you believe you have received this email in
error.

 

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