[Everyone] Death announcement: company gibbon

[Giles]

Fellow Skill-advancers

It is with great sadness that I have to inform you all of the death of
our company gibbon, Sarah Greene.

Sarah Greene apparently passed away peacefully in her sleep while
sedated after being involved in an horrific accident with a pair of
skis and a Land Rover.

I'm sure most of you will remember Sarah Greene and the frequent
updates we have had about her progress since we adopted her during the
Christmas Party in 2005.

For those of you who have joined since then and didn't understand what
all the gibbon emails were about: the company adopted Sarah Greene
during the annual Adopt-a-Gibbon campaign which is part of Comic
Relief Aid. In exchange for our £7,000 investment, we were sent
regular email updates and an annual signed photograph. You can see the
complete gallery of gibbon photos in the cupboard under the basement
stairs, the one with the "CLEANING STAFF ONLY" sign on it.

As some of you will memorably remember, our team was asked to choose a
name for the gibbon we were adopting, and the chosen name was "Gibby".
Sadly there was a mix-up with the meeting room name system, and the
gibbon ended up being called "Sarah Greene".

In honour of Sarah Greene's sad passing, Gibby has now been renamed
"Sarah Greene" in her honour.

There will be a memorial service for Sarah Greene in Sarah Greene
tomorrow afternoon at 3.30. Flowers can be left on the Market Stall in
The Village.

Kind regards

Giles
Executive Account Executive (Level 2, Pending Level 1)